Oh, Oh Seven

It's been a long time since I've seen a film in an actual cinema. The last movie I attended was 1917 (or was the last movie I attended in 1917?). That's when I first saw the trailer for the latest James Bond entry NO TIME TO DIE, which was due in April of 2020. Being a lifelong Bond aficionado, I promised myself it would be my next movie in a theater, having done so with each movie in the series with the exception of TOMORROW NEVER DIES, a blotch on my otherwise perfect record. Since this was also to be Daniel Crag's swan song as 007, there was no doubt in my mind I would be watching the antics of Ian Fleming's creation gallivanting across the big screen for my enjoyment. Then COVID struck and screwed the pooch for everyone around the world including the movie industry as the release of NO TIME TO DIE, along with a flock of film seagulls, was pushed back to Fall. Then Winter. Then 2021, but when? 

In the meantime the industry started premiering major releases straight to streaming, screwing theaters everywhere who had hoped to return one fine day. MGM was purchased by MGM and suddenly, it looked as though James Bond's latest adventure would debut on Prime. Taking in consideration the enormous budget behind NO TIME TO DIE (or NTTD for brevity's sake), it finally debuted in October and I was back in business again, ready, willing and able to step into a movie theater once again, sort of.

What with that nasty pandemic, sitting in an audience with actual people didn't seem that inviting and wearing a mask the entire time? Yeesh. But I thought I'd take the gamble anyway. Then real life (double yeesh) kept interfering since it became difficult to block out three frickin' hours (the long-ass running time of NTTD) for a movie excursion. This was something I wanted to do for myself so I pressed the issue and voila! Success! By this point, however, NTTD had already become available on pay-per-view and the only showtime open in my area was a matinee. So that's what I done did. 

Never mind all this crap. What about the goddamn movie?

Quite frankly, I'm kind of conflicted. While maintaining several elements from various films in the series, especially ON HER MAJETY'S SECRET SERVICE, this new movie in unlike any in the series, almost a re-invention in and of itself. While it isn't as subversive as director Danny Boyle's rumored take on the character that caused his departure, there is enough in this version by Cary Fukunaga, the first helmer to have a screenplay credit on a Bond film, to almost change the game. But it does come with a price, that being a mixed bag to be sure. While the highs outweigh the lows, too many cooks in the 007 kitchen made it a rather confusing meal.

The pre-title sequence set the tone for the whole film, unlike SPECTRE, the previous entry which the opening was better than the entire movie. The time around, the opening contains a lengthy flashback without Bond combined with a spectacular action sequence that makes it a direct sequel to the movie that preceded it, a real attempt to create a viable canon which barely existed in the pre-Craig years. Follow this with actual opening credits (how often do you see those anymore?) with a fairly adequate, though yet another somber theme song, this time by Billie Eilish and we're off to the races for next two and a half more hours (what is this-on Netflix or something?) Five years later, Bond is brought back to service, this time by mainstay CIA agent Felix Leiter, the always welcome Jeffrey Wright. Plot-wise, it's all over the map with SPECTRE returning, Bond at odds with M and M-I6 in general (the rascal) and a new villain plotting the end o' the world via nanobots and bio-warfare. The bad guy here is damn near secondary and underplayed rather frustratingly by Rami Malek, much the way Christoph Waltz did with Blofeld on the last pic. Waltz seemed to have embraced his role a little better this around, making Malek appear almost somnabulant. How about dialing down the near incoherent accent and beef up some personality there, Ram? I'm also not so keen on Lashana Lynch's inclusion as the most publicized new 007. I preferred Ana de Armas' asskicker, though actually would have chosen Naomie Harris' Moneypenny taking on the license to kill. (See SKYFALL) Quibbles aside, NTTD engaged me, juggling what we expect in a Bond film (action o'plenty), nostalgia here, there and everywhere and unexpected attempts to humanize the iconic character resulting in actual (and spoiler-free) touching moments that, by its end, put a definite punctuative mark to end the Daniel Craig era.  

I stayed in my seat through the end credits (A glutton for punishment? Present!) mainly to get to the final four words: JAMES BOND WILL RETURN. The question is, will I? As good as NTTD had been (a tie for third in the Craig series with QUANTUM OF SOLACE behind SKYFALL and CASINO ROYALE), the ending hit home in a way I didn't expect mainly because that's what it felt like to me. The End. For almost 60 years of my life, James Bond has been part of my life as one of my cinematic heroes and now, for intents and purposes, the curtain has fallen. Another Bond is inevitable, probably yet another re-imagining to placate whatever is considered acceptable in society, a constantly revolving carousel that only makes everyone dizzy. My curiosity will be piqued enough to watch, but the old kiss kiss bang bang is now irrelevant and I'm afraid that so am I. While I'm not about to ignore the passage of time, a major theme in NTTD, coincidentally enough, I don't know if I can lose myself in that world again, maybe because I've finally moved along, albeit reluctantly.  This may be goodbye, James, since it looks like we really don't have all the time in the world. 

However, Mr. Bond, I will remain forever eternally grateful for all that you gave this lifelong fan each time I entered a darkened cinema for another one of your exploits. There I could forget the rest of the world as I willingly immersed myself in yours, filled with excitement, adventure and derring-do,  emerging back into reality reinforced by the spectacular journey you've taken me on. 

Cheers to you, mate...shaken not stirred.

Other Bond posts:

2006: THE YEAR IN PIX (CASINO ROYALE)

OH THE WEATHER OUTSIDE IS FRIGHTFUL (QUANTUM OF SOLACE)

YOU STILL ONLY LIVE TWICE

BOND, JAMES BOND: NOBODY DOES IT BETTER

SKYFALL: THE LEGEND FINALLY CONTINUES

LICENSE TO TRILL

THE SPECTRE OF JAMES BOND

The Spectre of James Bond

Geeks are a whiney lot. They are notoriously difficult to please and obsess over every nuance, gesture and detail in search of any hint of discrepancy that will alter or dishonor the object of their passion. I count myself among them even though, like Groucho Marx, I would never belong to a club that would have someone like me as a member. As a lifelong 007 geek when that word meant someone who bit the heads off of chickens in the carnival, you have just entered my wheelhouse.

So get the cheese ready. I'm about to pour the whine.

SPECTRE is such an appropriate title for the latest James Bond film, but for many of the wrong reasons. Its predecessor, the game-changing SKYFALL, set the bar so high that it could be the specter looming over its follow-up, the quintessential hard act to follow and the pressure on the Bond crew to outdo it has had some unfortunate effects this go around. I'm not about to write SPECTRE off as a disappointment because there is so much it gets right. But with that, so much does not.

From the git, expectations were through the roof, especially with the brilliant pre-title sequence set at a Day of the Dead celebration in Mexico. The opening shot, an extended sequence taking a page of the BIRDMAN (or TOUCH OF EVIL, if you'd rather) playbook, begins with a parade until the camera picks up Bond and a babe strolling down the street, into a hotel and finishes with 007 on the rooftop as if on his way to work. It ends with Bond and bad guys duking it out in an out of control helicopter over the heads of parade revelers below. A really sensational sequence that quite frankly steals the whole movie, I felt relieved and ready to settle in for the ride..

The opening titles, in and of themselves a rarity these days for some inexplicable reason, unfortunately give this Aston Martin some engine trouble. The song, a sad sorry number by Sam Smith that I have previously complained about in a previous post (LICENCE TO TRILL) is bad enough, but Maurice Binder successor Danny Kleinmann's visuals are positively...or negatively, rather, creepy. Danny Craig's oiled up naked torso groped by adoring females and the homage to tentacle porn put me off more than Pierce Brosnan's torture in the opening credits of DIE ANOTHER DAY.

  

This sums up the entire experience for me, a series of extreme highs and lows that by the end left me more troubled than truly satisfied because frankly, I admit to have been spoiled by the previous outing and expected something more cohesive considering the talent involved. However, I am aware that the producers of the Bond franchise often shoot themselves in the foot more often than not so I lay many of the film's shortcomings at their feet. Sam Mendes pulled off the impossible with SKYFALL,
a recognizable directorial vision. This time around, there seemed to be so much emphasis on trying to make lightning strike twice that it appears forced, awkward and something a Bond film never has been, clunky.

A few other elements rankled me as well all within the confines of  a car chase scene through Rome. While maneuvering his Q tricked out sports car through the city streets and back alleys with a deadly assassin hot on his trail, Bond insipidly calls Moneypenny mid-way for some casual banter and unnecessary plot exposition, taking the piss completely out of it and transforming into excess without success. Toss in a couple of bad gags leftover from the Roger Moore era and the movie not only takes a step backwards, but falls sharply on its ass in the process.

On the other hand, the cast is near-flawless with some of the new faces introduced in the SKYFALL shining brightly. Ralph Fiennes' M continues to impress and when Ben Whishaw as Q is given more to do, the movie is better off for it. Dave Bautista's silent killer works his pro wrestling experience (the first of that profession since Peter Maiva-Dwayne Johnson's grandpa-in YOU ONLY LIVE TWICE) into an excellent train fight scene. Christoph Waltz underplays his main villain role to fine effect, though some of the quirky nuance he brings to Tarantino characters would have been welcome to help feed the initial delight of his casting in the first place. The two big reveals of his character, a combination of Benedict Cumberbatch in STAR TREK IN DARKNESS and AUSTIN POWERS IN GOLDMEMBER, became something the filmmakers should have avoided like the Black Plague. Monica Bellucci was a welcome addition who fortunately lived to see the end credits. And Lea Seydoux overcame her poorly written character as Bond's main squeeze with great finesse, not an easy task for such an ill-conceived character. Much has been made of the Bellucci's age as a Bond girl, which is noteworthy on the surface until Bond runs off with Seydoux, nearly half his age, at film's end.

Daniel Craig, the James Bond for this generation has been reportedly and understandably burned by the making of SPECTRE, but it doesn't show on the screen. He's certainly looser here than he ever has been, even allowing himself a sense of humor (blissfully pun-free). Physically, this film has certainly taken its toll upon him and since he's invested in the entire enterprise, Craig receives a co-producer credit, a first for any actor in the role. Despite his misgivings of one more time at the helm, I wouldn't be surprised to see him in Bond 25, but given his personality, I'm sure he'll wearing his cranky pants again.

So glad to hear a Thomas Newman  musical score again (not entirely sure he worked in an instrumental of that awful title song) and while cinematographer Roger Deakins couldn't come to the party this time, Hoyte Van Hoytema, who shot HER and LET THE RIGHT ONE IN, fill his shoes superbly. While I've kvetched enough about the story, there are superb individual lines and exchanges strewn within such as:
"Why did you come?"
"I came here to kill you."
"And I thought you came here to die."
"Well, it's all a matter of perspective."

The attempt to reboot the criminal organization known as Spectre (hence the title) worked for the most part by tying in all the elements from the previous three films together, though I wonder why Mathieu Amalric's Dominic Greene, the villain from QUANTUM OF SOLACE, was missing. The desert fortress in the crater became a touchstone to YOU ONLY LIVE TWICE's volcano lair, as do some other callbacks to previous entries in the series. The finale wraps up in London, something the series has never done before, putting a rather lovely bookend to the Craig quadrilogy. However, SPECTRE reminds me of the recent FX TV version of FARGO. That show works best when strays away from the source material and becomes its own entity. SKYFALL, it being the 50th anniversary recipient, was able to walk the tightrope between past and present, often seamlessly. Here, the references seem an afterthought, forced and repetitive, muddying the waters of the Bond legacy.

When I eventually rewatch SPECTRE, which of course I will do because, well, that is what I do, I may reassess many of the drawbacks I found upon this initial viewing. In order of how I rank the Daniel Craig Bond films, I rank it number after SKYFALL, CASINO ROYALE and QUANTUM OF SOLACE. Not a weak effort, just overblown, overdone and ultimately, not enough, goddamn it.

Sorry, James. But according to the final tag, you will return. And so will I. It's what we do.

License to Trill

The theme for the anxiously awaited James Bond film SPECTRE has been released and elicits nothing morethan polite golf applause. Sam Smith's "Writing's on the Wall" is underwhelming to say the least, but certainly not the worst to say the most. It's a wisp of a tune that actually should have been something to blow the doors off an Aston Martin. Instead, there's this B-side ballad and unfortunately, the Writing on the Wall reads:
Here I sit,
brokenhearted.
Came to shit,
but only farted.

To be frank, the opening theme song for Bond films has always been a dicey proposition. The franchise tends to cater to current pop music trends and with mixed results since it is so ephemeral. It began in the Connery era when, after the one two knockout punches delivered by Shirley Bassey on GOLDFINGER and Tom Jones with THUNDERBALL, the singer chosen for YOU ONLY LIVE TWICE was...Nancy Sinatra, undoubtedly due to "These Boots Were Made for Walkin'". Thank goodness the song itself was decent enough and the production covered up many of her flat tones. Many times the gamble paid off, but for every Paul McCartney, Duran Duran and Tina Turner, the landscape is littered with a-ha, Rita Coolidge and worst of all, Sheryl Crow, badly in need of Auto-Tune for her flat rendition of TOMORROW NEVER DIES, making Nancy Sinatra sound like Maria Callas in comparison. But my favorite song credit has to be "THE WORLD IS NOT ENOUGH performed by Garbage". I couldn't agree more.

But I'm no fan of Adele's Oscar winning theme for SKYFALL either. I find it mid-range and rather unremarkable. Sure, I predictably go for the undeniable classics such as the aforementioned Bassey and Jones numbers. In Bassey's case, it stops and ends with GOLDFINGER. DIAMONDS ARE FOREVER is acceptable if deriviative and the less said about MOONRAKER the better.I find Gladys Knight's rendition of LICENSE TO KILL underrated just as I do Tina Turner's GOLDENEYE. I'm also a sucker for both Lulu's MAN WITH THE GOLDEN GUN and Jack White/Alicia Keys' "Another Way to Die" from QUANTUM OF SOLACE. And every time I hear "Nobody Does It Better" from THE SPY WHO LOVED ME, Carly Simon wins my heart every single time.

You'll notice I'm not mentioning the composers here. Need I mention John Barry, Thomas Newman, Marvin Hamlisch, David Arnold, et al? I suppose I should but I am concentrating on the finished product.

But while we're on the subject, Carl Davis' instrumental renditions of the 007 theme songs on the album BOND FOR ORCHESTRA transforms many of these otherwise piss poor songs into something quite magical and decent offerings even better. Chris Cornell's "You Know My Name" from CASINO ROYALE just knocks it into the cheap seats and "We Have All the Time in the World", even without Louis Armstrong's melancholy raspiness, is still a wonderful melody from ON HER MAJESTY'S SECRET SERVICE. Madonna's mediocre electronica effort,  DIE ANOTHER DAY, actually gets to live a little while longer.

Naturally,the songs  have no bearing on the film themselves. When the two coincide, it's serendipity. When it doesn't, it's not a total loss. No matter how I feel about Smith's half-hearted SPECTRE theme, it will be aided by yet another brilliant title sequence created by Maurice Binder's worthy successor, Danny Kleinman, a rarity in this day and age.

Of course, one could only imagine the themes and artists that could have been, such as this previously lost recording of Johnny Cash's take on THUNDERBALL

.

Yippy-ky-ay, Mr. Bond!