Thursday, January 26, 2012

The Doctor is In



About a year ago, I had been introduced to a co-worker’s grandson as “This is Scott. He writes books.”

“What kind of books?” the pre-teen inquired.

“Oh, they’re about me,” I told him. “I have to write about myself. Nobody else will.”

One look at my bibliography validates that statement. However, now I can make another literary claim to fame that I had nothing to do with. Scott Cherney is a supporting character in my friend Thomas Amo’s paranormal novel AN APPLE FOR ZOE: THE FORSAKEN and I am just tickled pink. Don’t believe me? Look.

ZOE (a proposed trilogy in which THE FORSAKEN is the first chapter) is one crazy-ass roller coaster read concerning the investigation of a series of occult murders that link with movie stars from the Golden Age of Hollywood and the greatest hits from the Serial Killer Hall of Fame. Once it hits the ground running, Tom’s book is positively relentless. I had barely enough time to catch my breath in between chapters before the action and horror crank up all over again. Best of all are two of the best characters I’ve run across in this genre-the insane Russian twin smoking-hot female assassins known as the Baranova Sisters, Tarista and Devonia. I can’t wait until the next installment to see what bat-shit mayhem they’ll be up to next.

As for me, I turn up about 2/3 of the way through AN APPLE FOR ZOE. Well, at least Tom’s version of me. Doctor Scott Cherney, at your service. It's funny because there actually is a Dr. Scott Cherney, an ophthalmologist who lives just down the state from me in Eugene, Oregon. I discovered him when I Googled myself one day. (Yes, I Google myself. I'm a consenting adult) But what kind of doctor am I? I’m a gopher doctor. If somebody gets sick, I gopher another doctor. Ba-dump-bump! (You can take the boy out Pollardville, but you can’t take Pollardville out of the boy) Actually, Scott is a police psychiatrist extraordinaire. Good ol’ Doc Cherney gets to utter the phrase that pays, “Billy Bob No-Nose here isn’t your typical Ned Beatty rapin’ hillbilly.” Sounds like something I’d say. Tom had also observed me when I used to smoke and added that to the character.

In a matter of three moves, he had a single cigarette from the pack to his lips and lit.

Tom said he noticed I did that every single time without fail. I had no idea. Sounds pretty cool to me, even if I haven’t smoked in over fourteen years. The only thing he changed was that the good doctor smokes non-filtered Camels while my brand of choice was Camel Light. Filters were always better otherwise you’re spitting out tobacco after every puff.

So I am humbled that my friend has chosen to honor me in this fashion. Tom has also stated that his dream cast for the film version of AN APPLE FOR ZOE, Dr. Scott Cherney will be played by…wait for it…Robert Downey Jr. Yes, really, but it's only because Bob Denver is dead.


In all sincerity, this really starts out my year on the best note possible. My friend Tom Amo made me part of his dream. Thanks, mate.


NOW WHERE THE HELL IS MY ACTION FIGURE?

AN APPLE FOR ZOE is now available from Amazon in paperback and Kindle versions. Go forth and buy a copy. Do it for me. Do it for him. Do it for Robert Downey Jr. He needs the work.

3 comments:

Thomas Amo said...

I can say with hand on heart this was the most fun I ever had reading a blog! You Mr. Cherney are hands down the funniest man alive!

Sean A said...

Scott,I have just recently finished reading AAFZ. I actually cracked up when I got to Dr. Cherney's part and actually saw your mug all the way through the chapter...

M. E. Franco said...

Loved it!